Don’t! The Green Room

This Don’t honestly makes me a little sad. There are so many positives about Southbank’s The Green Room, that it breaks my heart that the young eatery couldn’t just get it together. These positives include:

The Location. Right near Waterloo and Westminster’s main attractions, The Green Room is in a great spot for an easy dinner before or after one of London’s many activities. We popped into the restaurant before seeing a show at the Southbank Centre, a favorite destination for arts and entertainment.

The exterior of London’s The Green Room

The Building. The Green Room looks really cool. It’s in a giant, modern building that looks like an LA pad, not a London restaurant. The decor mixes earthy elements of stone, wood, and neutral colors to compliment the menu’s organic, green mission statement. Inside, the restaurant has a hipster vibe, with cafeteria-style seating, recycled bottle salt and pepper shakers, and clip board menus.

Laid-back dining at The Green Room, London

The Service. The service was so fast and friendly, I was honestly blown away. We had the kindest young guy for our server, that was so quick with recommendations, drinks, and our meals. He understood we had a show to catch and made it his mission to get us there on time. He did not miss a beat, and compared to the typical London restaurants, I was thoroughly impressed.

Those are huge positives, right? How could The Green Room not be considered a Do? Well, unfortunately, the bad really does outweigh the good here. There are two other components that make up a restaurant review, and these, my friends, are The Green Room’s negatives.

The Ambience. Sure the aesthetics are nice, but what about the mood? The mood was, well, scattered. It felt like chaos the entire time. I never felt relaxed. I blame this mainly on the acoustics. The large box of a building and high ceilings held constant bouncing, banging, rumbling noise. This noise came from the overflowing bar and the high-turnover tables. From the couple next to us fighting (and then later breaking up with her storming out) to the people trying to push tables together for their friends. There was just so much going on and just goddamn noise. 

Dinner time at The Green Room, London

The Food. The food was basically inedible at The Green Room. I can honestly say it was disgusting. My husband and I both left food on our plates and holes in our stomachs. (Which later caused us to get shitfaced.) If was such a disappointment. We started with the BBQ wings which were prepared in the most strange/awful sauce. Obviously, no comparison to US BBQ, but these weren’t even in the same playing field as UK BBQ! Next, we had our entrees. I had the vegan burger which had a normal taste, but was so dry. I subbed out the chips/salad for the samphire I noticed on the menu. Samphire is one of my favorite English greens, and not seen on many menus, so I order it any chance I get. Or at least I used to. Now, I still have The Green Room’s horrible samphire taste lingering in my mouth. It was served to me in the form of cold, green, rubbery salt sticks. I was heartbroken. Lastly, my husband’s grilled tuna steak was to be prepared medium-rare. You can probably guess where this is headed. It was gray. Completely well-done and an unattractive color. It was an incredibly terrible food experience from start to finish.

So, as you can see, despite the positives, there were some huge unforgettable negatives in my experience at The Green Room. I won’t be returning, and that fact alone is what lands you on the Don’t list. Diners beware!

Clean lines at The Green Room, London

The Green Room
101 Upper Ground
London SE1 9PP

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